Labels

I was watching a movie yesternight, which got me into thinking about 'labels'. By labels here, I don't mean 'Prada' or 'Gucci'. I mean, the terms we use to call someone in our day-to-day lives- mother, father, son, daughter, wife, husband and what not. We label everyone, every relation.
           
In the midst of labelling people, we often forget who that person is. "A mother is supposed to sacrifice her wants and needs for her children." I ask why? I know she has to, even if she does not want. Father is the man who runs the family in this patriarchal society. But why? Just because of the labels we gave them? Why can't a woman go and work and a man takes care of his family? And I'm not talking about feminism here, so don't take me wrong. But sometimes we need to look beyond the labels we gave them, to see the real being. I just took a mother and a father as an example, you can take a million others.

Let's talk about relationships now. Well, my thoughts might sound a little weird to you, but kindly spare a minute to read it. Labelling people as girlfriends or boyfriends is very common these days. Every now and then, there are breakups and patch-ups, heartbreaks, get-overs and rebounds. But, do we really need to be in a  relationship or to be called as a boyfriend or a girlfriend to be in love? Here is where our thought might differ. I have this really different perception about love. It's not that I don't respect the rest of you, but everybody has their own point of view right? So here's mine. Two people do not have to make commitments or being called by stupid names to be in love. My whole concept of being in love is that you cannot confine it with a commitment or a few labels. It's much deeper than that. It lies above all. "I would never call him my boyfriend, I would call him my love." And love is not a label.

Take marriages for instance. The country in which I live, a girl crosses 25 and her parents, relatives and everybody she knows, start to find the perfect 'dulha' for her, so that she could start her so called 'new life'. Why can't two grown-ups who are in love decide to live their life, without getting married? Why does marriage have to be a stamp on their lives that they are allowed to live together from now onward?  I don't mean to hurt anybody's feelings here, just expressing my views. A piece of paper, or seven circles around some fire, would prove that you are man and wife now? Well, that's our society there.

I really liked this dialogue from another movie- "I don't need a piece of paper or any kind of rituals, to prove how much I love you." And they lived happily ever after. Of course  in the movie. In reality, the 'log kya sochenge' factor comes along with heavy emotional drama. My point here is about labels. Labels tend to stereotype people and that's a complete bullshit. All we can do is find the person behind it.

Inside that devil.

"Inside that devil lied a soul, which wanted to be heard, to be seen

And when he knew the world was hard and mean,

She came to his rescue, loved him, touched him,

In a way that nobody did, and now the light inside him would never dim.

He showed her a different side of his,

The gentleness and the care and the kiss,

Inside that devil lied a child who just wanted one wish

It was her, but he didn't want to be selfish"

Well, it is a part from the drabble I'm writing. Coming soon.

Lost much?

Yes, I'm lost. I really don't know what am I doing with life or what am I going to do in future. I don't know the decisions I made were right or wrong. I don't know why I don't listen to my mother when she gives my the right advise and I always go for the wrong. I don't know why I think so much- about the steps I've already taken, about the future. Right now, my mind might blast with the massive amount collisions of my thoughts. "I should have done that." Yes, I'm not some 'mahatma'. I regret. I regret some decisions I've taken in the past, and I might regret in the future looking at my rate of taking 'bad decisions'. But I guess that's okay. We make mistakes to learn. But what if you make that very mistake again? There is so much going on your mind that you're not able to think, not clear about anything, like everything is a blur. You don't know what to do or what not. Like, there is just way too much to handle. Work. Studies. Love. Family. Stress. Expectations. Feeling of incompetence. You feel lost, where everybody is going on such a fast rate. Your inspiration is lost. Your confidence is lost. Your faith is lost. You become this heavy pessimist. "I can't do it." You say this, and you've already lost the battle.
At these moments, the best thing you can do is to believe in yourself. You can do it. You don't have to do it for others, do it for yourself. Find yourself. Maybe its okay to not know what will happen, let it be a surprise, otherwise what would be the fun? Not thinking about the future and making the best out of the present, I've heard this many times before. But I guess, it's time. It's time to implement all that shit.